Why you should block your ex

One minute you’re browsing their Instagram… the next, you’re crying down the phone to them in the back of a taxi, on the way to their house.

G-String Blues

I had been, for the last hour, flashing my underwear to my entire workplace

How to avoid a f*ckboy

Making grand gestures is his forte, but beware – his moral compass is about as wayward as Augustus Gloop in a chocolate shop

Heartbreak at the Disco

They couldn’t be drawing closer, it was just the flashing lights. He wouldn’t do that after liking my profile picture. They were just good friends, really good friends.

Goldilocks and The 3 Dates: Just Right

We even managed to persuade one unfortunate gentleman that a giant wheel of brie was in-fact an unusual type of cheesecake, (he proceeded to serve himself a generous slice).

Goldilocks and the 3 Dates: Too Hot

He looked up slowly through his eyelashes, a Gaston- like smirk playing on his lips

Finding/ Not Finding Love Online

We are relying upon algorithms to inform us, via email, of our recommended shags within a 5-mile radius – what a time to be alive!

Goldilocks and the 3 Dates: Too Cold

The film was without a doubt one of the worst I have ever seen – I won’t name any names, but it rhymes with Des Wiserbaables

What to Expect When a Man Gets Down on His (Proverbial) Knee

I was rudely interrupted by what I can only describe as the hesitant throat-clearing of a best man on the verge of performing his overly-rehearsed speech.